Earlier this week I received a lovely email from Jenny Appleby expressing her positive feedback for this blog. I thanked her but explained that I get very nervous when I click send. She replied with, “Don’t be nervous Luke, what have you got to lose?”
Jenny’s message got me thinking as I have struggled with self-confidence and have always felt insecure about showing the real me. I think I fear people laughing or judging me harshly for the big dreams I have.
Have you felt this kind of nervous insecurity when trying something new, hard or difficult? Are you holding yourself back from experiences and dreams because your fears get in the way?
I remember a charity parachute jump I did many years ago. I don’t particularly like heights and had no great desire to leap from a plane. I’m no adrenaline junkie and run away from rollercoasters and big fairground rides. But I found myself signed up to do the charity jump. I raised the sponsorship money and off we went.
We had a days training on the ground which focused on getting us to understand jumping out and safety, we endlessly repeated the count 1000, 2000, 3000, 4000 check canopy. Up we went in this small plane to 3000 feet and prepared to jump.
You might think fear would have overwhelmed me, but I have to say I was relatively calm. The training had worked, and I spent the flight thinking through what I had learned. Of course, I felt fear, but also excitement. I believed I could do it.
So, eventually my time came, and I was at the open door ready to jump. The instructor counted down and out I went without much of a thought. I had felt the fear but did it anyway.
Feeling the fear and doing it anyway is the key message of the story. When you are trying something new, when you are doing something worthwhile and that you believe in then, you are going to be at the edge of your comfort zone. You are likely to be fearful, to feel nervous and scared. It’s natural, but how you respond to those emotions is what defines you and the life you will lead.
If you can feel the fear and do it anyway, then the world opens for you. Life becomes incredibly rewarding as nothing can hold you back. Each time you repeat this process of feeling fear and then smashing through it, you get stronger, and it gets easier. You can live the life you have always dreamed of. Long before others believe, you must believe it’s possible. Remember, we climb the mountain, not in giant leaps but one small step at a time. Today I leave you with Jenny’s words.
“Don’t be nervous, what have you got to lose?”
Thank you Luke. Your blogs are so encouraging and I look forward to reading them and find them really inspiring. Keep blogging to continue to encourage this 76 year old!
Thanks Margaret for the lovely feedback. It means a lot.
Best Wishes
Luke x
Thank you Luke, I look forward to reading your blogs, I have been struggling a bit since I retired, where do I fit in now? Am I wasting time or is it OK to relax? Kids don’t need me anymore, husband always at work, shall I start a new project in my beloved garden, now overpowered by next doors extension? Your blogs are helping me to look at things from a different angle and give me back some confidence to try something new. I too am hovering over the send button, but as another lady said to you” what’s to lose”….. here goes, a step in the right direction! Keep blogging!!!
HI Kate
Thanks for sharing your story. I can imagine its not an easy time. My father has been retired for about ten years; he said something interesting to me recently. I was “complaining a bit to him about never seeing him anymore.” He replied that he had spent his life putting others, primarily his family first.
Now he was retired he had decided to be more selfish and to be and do as wanted to. In his case, it has involved a tremendous amount of travel. I rarely know what country he is in, he has a new partner and is very happy in his life. I miss him, but it is his life.
Perhaps the idea I’m trying to explore is that maybe retirement can be looked at as an opportunity, for perhaps the first time in your life to be selfish. To explore and do the things that you didn’t do for whatever reason before.
Just thinking about your garden for a second. It must be gutting to have the extension overpowering it — two possible solutions. Move house, so you get a new garden that you can devote your retirement completely to transforming. A blank canvas that you now have the skill, the money ( hopefully! ) and the time to make your dream space.
Or if you don’t fancy moving, how about seeing it as an opportunity. Investigate shaded gardens and rethink your garden in the light of the building. See it as an opportunity to start again in your garden rather than the end of your beautiful garden.
Best wishes
Luke
Thank you Luke, since last messaging you I now have a new very tall hedge planted as phase 1 of remodelling my garden, and planning a trip to the wilds of Scotland to connect with nature!!
Keep blogging! Thank you for being so inspirational.
Kate
Thanks for the update. I’m so pleased to hear your news. Good for you. I’m off to Scotland too in the summer. I can’t wait. I have never been walking there but have about 10 days planned around three shows we do in Glasgow and Edinburgh.
Best Wishes
Luke x
Very good write up today. We’ve been at the very top of our game to the very bottom and nearly losing everything. It’s degrading and embarrassing and some people dine out on you failing. We are just about standing back up now and the future prospects look amazing. I don’t ever want to be rock bottom again though, it so stressful and there seems to be no light. Keep up the good scripts.
The last message I sent was meant to be for ‘on the Edge’. I can’t move my message though.